Subtract the why

When you receive a feeling or sensation in the body, can you express that, in that moment, and not after? Or do you tend to question why you’re having that feeling? There must be a reason, right!? And is it right?

What if you subtracted the question ‘why’ and allowed your body to express the feeling through sound and movement?

Did you know that 93% of communication is non-verbal?

93%! Whaaaa??!!! I know!

Stop explaining why, and just express it baby!

No more will we suppress this essential non-verbal communication, no more questioning! Stop asking “Why doesn’t he know how I’m feeling?” “Why can’t they see what I need?”, “Is this feeling of fear from my childhood?” “Is it an abandonment pattern of mine?”

What if you fu*ked off the questions, and just allowed the sensation to be felt and expressed? Don’t ask why. Don’t hesitate. Don’t doubt yourself.

Just for a little while. Practice this for one day.Maybe for 21 days. Could you give yourself permission?

I just got off a call with David Deida and he said to me “If you wait for the mind to be clear, you would be waiting eons. Just go straight into the responsiveness of your body.”

Be in the moment. How you feel in THAT moment. And then the next. And then the next.

Isn’t this the practice? Isn’t that what we’ve been practice Yoga and Meditation? To be present.

For the feminine, our gift is to be present with the energy that flows through us AND how it wants to be expressed. Sharing this gift with our intimate partner(s).

You want more depth? More love? More attention/presence? Then give this gift, in the moment.

Let go of the why, and trust your body’s intelligence, it’s wisdom. And sound it, move it, let it be as it is!!

Vulnerability at it’s best!

If you need a list of emotions to familiarise yourself with, click here for Professor Plutchik’s: The Wheel Of Emotions. Read through each one and connect with how they would feel in your body. And practice expressing that emotion. Practice it as an expression and not an accusation, as teachers Lisa Page and Nina Lombardo would say.

From there, try the practice of responding to the moment. How you can non-verbally communicate the way you feel when you move your hips, your shoulders, expressing the way it feels when you tickle your arm, responding to the way it feels when you put coconut oil on your skin, what it’s like to light a candle, putting fresh flowers in a vase. You could also practice what it’s like to express the feeling of being cold when you step outside, when you’re exhausted, when you’re on hold with telstra, the list goes on. Express these feelings as expression and not accusation.

What is like when you subtract the why!?

Share your experience in Our Meditation Group xx e

Manifestation is a crock of sh*t

Manifestation is a crock of shit, unless you’re in action.

No matter how pretty it looks on your vision board, there must be small steps made every day to bring it into life.

No matter how many times you read it in your journal, you must use the resources you have to make it reality.

No matter how much you talk about it, there must be no expectation so that you see the possibilities.

No matter how hard you Meditate on it, you must be present in your moment to moment interactions to seize the opportunities.

If you’re serious about it, be in action!

Keep moving forward

Keep moving forward, so you don’t get stuck.

Keep moving and see what rises to the surface.

Keep moving and love yourself. You are brave enough to look at what shows up.

Keep moving until it transforms again and again. Until you feel purified from the sweat, the sound, the beat, the breath.

Keep moving until you return to your human, and you are Spirit moving in human form.

Keep moving until you feel the peace, the connection, the unity.

2020 Vision: To Create

I’m not a victim of my circumstances. I create my reality, every step of the way. I have chosen and choose, what today and tomorrow looks like.

The way I think, speak and act is within my control, it is within my power. I get to choose how I do this.

The word that has come up often in the last few days is CREATE. I am a creator, I am creative.

I get to create my reality, my intimate relationships, my work, my friendships. By staying present and connected to the deepest part of myself, I will always create the most unbelievable moments. Unbelievable, because I have allowed them to be born into this moment without expectation, without thinking about them, without limitations, without boxing myself in to other people’s ideals.

I allow myself to create a reality I didn’t even know was possible, until it flowed through me.

By trusting deeply in what feels true and real for me, I will always be creative. Allowing things to bend and move, that shapes a reality so spontaneous and interesting, it’s an art piece.

Hello 2020!

Good questions to ask yourself before the year ends

In tonights Meditation for the decade, we considered a few questions around our achievements for this year and what our biggest challenges were. We also reflected on where we were 10 years ago, to where we are now.

Knowing that naturally we are evolving and with more mindfulness practice, we are always moving in the direction we are destined for. So those things that we want to improve on or be better at, now, may be a piece of piss by 2030.

I remember in 2010 I wanted ‘balance’ in my life. I was always swinging from one extreme to the other and now balance it is easy as 1, 2, 3!

How can you reflect on 2019, so you can move into 2020 feeling inspired and clear? Ask yourself these questions and take one or two minutes to write the answers:

  1. What company do(did) you keep this year? Do (did) they inspire you?
  2. What did you want to achieve this year?
  3. What was your biggest challenge? What depleted you?
  4. What did these challenges teach you about yourself?
  5. Now, what do you want more of?
  6. Complete this statement “I now take responsibility for …”  (be as accurate as you can, rather than too broad)

What is your intention now? Trust that by 2030 it will be a piece of piss, which can help you relax now and be a magnet for those things that you want. If you keep coming back to your intention in your daily rituals, habits and practice you will always be connected to what is best for you.

We remembered in tonight’s Meditation that it is being in the NOW that is what gets us to where we want to go, not by the thinking of how to get there (so much). So here’s a way you can practice being in the NOW so that you can take responsibility for what you want in your life:

*Practice daily or multiple times daily (have touch points in your day where you take a moment to ask yourself the following)…

  1. Sit or lie down comfortably in silence with no distraction (no phone + no cats).
  2. Observe how you feel physically and identify where you feel a sensation the most.
  3. What does it feel like? A dull ache, a fluter, pins and needles, a tightness, throbbing.
  4. Where do you feel it in the body? There might be multiple areas.
  5. Focus on this for a minute or so.
  6. Next, take your attention to how you feel emotionally.
  7. Could you name the emotion(s)? Anger, anxiety, awkwardness, boredom, calmness, craving, disappointment, envy, excitement, fear, guilt, interest, joy, pride, relief, sadness, satisfaction.
  8. Where do you feel these emotions in the body?
  9. Focus on this for a minute or so.
  10. Next, take your attention to your thoughts.
  11. What kind of thoughts are you having? Are they trying to solve something? Is it constant chatter? Judgemental or critical?
  12. Get curious and observe your thoughts for a minute or so.
  13. Now write this down and be as descriptive as you can.

This practice will develop your ability to understand how you feel in the NOW. It will develop your ability to describe how you feel (physically, emotional and mentally) and give you the tools to communicate authentically in future conversations.

When you can identify the above you know that if the feeling is good, you want more of that. Keep making the decisions and choices that take you to these places (and people). If it doesn’t, then you might possibly be moving in the direction that isn’t serving your intention (or purpose).

If you would like to receive the recording of this mindfulness meditation please request it by completing the below form.

If you need a community that supports you in remembering these tools, then join our meditation community by completing the below form and we look forward to connecting with you at our next month’s Meditation.

A Love letter to Love

My eyes can hardly open they’re so swollen from tears. I lay naked, wrapped in the blanket that still smells of you. I’m grieving the loss of something I haven’t yet experienced, but I so desperately want to. I want Love so bad, yet it’s too intense for me to receive. The way Love asks you to be vulnerable is too much to bare. So I push it away before it has a chance to penetrate me. As it stands in front of me demanding that I surrender.

Those first three nights we spent together were magic. But as the third night ended, my mind planted every possible ploy to get me out of there. And so I told you it was ‘goodbye’ but what I really wanted to say was ‘This is really intense for me. I don’t know how to do this. Can you help me?’.

I’m sorry, I didn’t know how to communicate in that moment. It was intense and a blur with a mix of strong feelings I had for you and sabotaging thoughts that had polluted my mind all night while you were sleeping. My brain was popping like fireworks and I didn’t know what was actually real compared to what were my unhelpful patterns, that were trying to convince me was real. 

In any case, it was all real for me that night. 

I know I am capable of Love yet I cannot seem to surrender to it. Since I can remember I have not allowed myself to surrender to Love, pleasure, or generosity from others without feeling I need to give something back. I am always comfortable to give, but a very rare occasion for me to receive.

From this moment forward, I now open to receive more, although I feel this is a selfish intention. I must explore the realm of receiving so I can find the balance of Loving freely, without attachment or expectation.

I know this will show up in all areas like money, sex and purpose. 

Gently and steady, I will receive more.

The people pleaser in me needs to die

The energy was ecstatic and high. So much electricity moving through my body that I had to do something. I wanted to get out of the house. I needed to get away from what I didn’t want to deal with.

Ohhhhh hello distraction. I know you very well. Let’s ignore this deep core feeling, and stay high and ungrounded until it goes away?

This morning as I sit here, dealing with the come down from the chaos, I reflect on how I’d like to shame myself for how I acted yesterday. I’d like to berate myself for the years I’ve played out this pattern of mine, to ignore myself and never speak my mind. A pattern that keeps me bound to less-than-ordinary and away from the things I truely want to experience.

It’s pushing people away that I work so hard to please.

I would like to spiral into a hole of pity, but instead, today I’m deciding that it wouldn’t be useful. Instead, I’m using the energy that I have, to explore a new way of looking at my behaviour.

What I know
I ignore my hurt, to please others.
I shut my mouth, to please others.
I adjust my needs, to meet the needs of the other.

How can I look at it differently?
This is the bit where I get stuck. It’s the first time I’ve really given this part of me time to surface and be seen. I can’t see anyway to change it. I don’t know how. There’s been many times this morning during my journalling, where I’ve stopped to google the new moon meaning, I’ve downloaded Brene Brown’s book, downloaded Jeff Browns book. What else can I do, anything but journal how I’m feeling.

Where do I start to change this pattern of mine?

How can I look at this differently. How can I help myself?
Brene Brown says that being vulnerable isn’t easy. And you will get your ass kicked in the arena of vulnerability. There is some commitment to getting your ass kicked…. I mean who really wants to commit to that?

She says you need courage. That I know I have, being a Leo and a Docherty! So how do I prepare myself to get my ass kicked.

What I think vulnerability would look like for me now:
Feeling like I’ll hurt the other person, but I say it anyway.
Saying what I think, and being alone.
Asking for what I want, and the other person won’t want to do it with me.

How I could see it instead:
Not taking responsibility for the other persons feelings.
Saying what I think, and gaining respect.
Asking for what I want, and getting closer to the people who resonate.

This won’t be an easy path. I might loose people along the way. Maybe it will feel familiar eventually, that low level of anxiety that rises when I speak my mind. But for now, in the beginning it will have to be taken in baby steps. One conversation after another, noticing when the need rises – the moment I want to push it aside – the pause – and the moment I break the habit – and say what I need too.

Ahhhhhhh….

Wish me luck!

Somewhere in between

Since the beginning of this year, I’ve felt somewhere in between. There is a new generation that is taking the social media world by storm, with what seems to be such ease and understanding. Sharing their message so comfortably on this platform.

I’ve always been one to trust myself completely and confident to do things without being told how. However, earlier this year I tried to learn the ways of the online business so I could reach far and wide – women across the country and the world, while I live in Byron Bay. During this time I felt completely out of my depth, trying things that didn’t seem to feel right for me, but I continued to explore it because I hadn’t done it like that before (so maybe that’s why it felt weird?).

It all got too much, and I decided to put the project away entirely. I put it away because I became disconnected to WHY I was even doing it. Money was definitely not a reason for me to hang around, so I took 6 months off social media. I dove deep into observation and inquiry, and what I have become really clear about is that I do this because it feels like it’s my purpose and my gift to share. I’ve also discovered that I’ve continued to make great connections without ‘needing’ to use this platform. I also feel more connected to myself.

Now that I’m in a place where I feel connected more than ever as to WHY, it’s now my goal to open my mind to using social media in a way that feels TRUE for me. Not posting a certain way because it’s the correct formula. And no longer scrolling for hours either. I haven’t missed social media at all. Not one bit. I am still connected to events, my family and friends and even new lovers without any social media platform.

I do believe social media is a fabulous way to share creatively and stay connected with people. But first we must recalibrate the way we use it. A Social Media detox might just be in order.

If YOU feel ready for a detox, consider what you might gain:

  • More time in your day, less pressure, less anxiety.
  • Access to your creative side.
  • Connection to your personal purpose.
  • Have more conversations with people who are more your kind.
  • Create deeper connections and purpose in your relationships/friendships.

This list will continue to grow, and heck you might even save more money! Then when you feel ready to enter the social media world again, you can do it with more purpose and intention.

Because without intention, everything feels blurgh.

I welcome your questions about my experience, so feel free to contact me.

So what that you’re uncomfortable!?

Not an easy title or feeling to sit in: Uncomfortable. Most of us avoid being uncomfortable. Actually, I could confidently say that all of us avoid being uncomfortable.

We find solace in distraction and busy-ness, just so we don’t feel uncomfortable. However, it’s still going to be there if you don’t deal with it. Sitting beneath the surface of mindless pleasures and quick fixes.

Some people spend their whole lives looking for distraction just so they are not left on their own with their uncomfortable feelings.

We grab a hit of dopamine from our phones, chocolate, drugs, alcohol, one night stands, netflix, going hard at the gym or Yoga!

What we aren’t told, is that, by being able to hold ourselves in discomfort can be the best service we offer ourselves and the other. How often, as a friend or a parent, do we try and ease the discomfort of the other? Being in service for that person may be leaving them to feel their own karma. It would be a disservice to take that from them.

By being in service does not always feel like ‘Love and Light’. Being in service calls us to be honest, shed light on the truth and to be a reflection for someone else. This is not always easy or graceful. But by training ourselves to sit in the uncomfortable may just lead us to be the best parent, friend, aunty, therapist there is.

So here’s a thought, stop distracting yourself and go get bored until your uncomfortable. Then stay there for a while. When you want to leave, stay there for a little longer.

Fu*ked in the head or deep in the heart

This week in my 7 energy centres study program we explored the qualities of how green can offer us a chance to let go and find more space to connect with our hearts. We invited our hearts into the possibility of more opening, vulnerability and truth.

It seemed so fitting that this was the week I was asked to let go of a lover and trust in the flow of what’s to come.

My head battled away, needing answers and logical understanding of what the future is going to look like. But when I dropped my attention into my heart, it simply asked me to let go.

It felt so tight just underneath my skin and my heart felt a little closed, like I was holding my breath just before the letting go. I didn’t want it to look like this. I wanted our final night together to be happy and passionate so he could remember me as a beautiful goddess. (You know, like I’m in a romantic movie with mood lighting and ambient tunes). But it wasn’t like that. Instead I felt like a tender child and I needed softness and care.

The practice of bringing awareness to the moment helped me acknowledge what was truth, to stop fighting for it to look a certain way, and just allow myself to show up as I was. As undesirable as it felt for me. However, the more I accepted my truth in this moment I disarmed the power that the thoughts had over me.

Today, as I said good-bye, I still feel the letting go is unfolding. Not yet complete, but somehow I know this is the magic. This is the living. Not perfect and a constant ebb and flow.

“I express truthfully from the heart”


You too can experience more of this in my upcoming study program: The 7 Energy Centres beginning 4th June. In the previous programs I’ve run, those who attended have shared that it has not only changed the way they look at their world but changed their relationship with their loved ones and community.

This study program is something that will:

  • Deepen your morning practice/ ritual.
  • Expand your knowledge around your emotions and how to feel more empowered in feeling them.
  • Cleanse the negative bullsh*t you tell yourself.

For more details click here.